The chapter on communication provided some
ideas for improving communication. Are any of these ideas helpful to you? For
the blog this week, make 1 post of 200 words or 2 of 100 words each. You can
also comment or expand on another student's posting.
You can describe how you plan to apply some of
the ideas in this chapter to improving communication with your children, boss,
friends or parents or anyone who is important in your life.
Comment on
this video, Lessons from
Auschwitz, The Power of Our Words. The central message is that our words are powerful and
we never know when our words are the last ones a person will hear from us.
What is your personality type and how does it
affect your personal communication style?
You can also read the scenarios below and
use your knowledge of personality type to suggest ways to improve the
communication. For a quick review of personality type, click on Do What You Are
on the front page of your portfolio on College and Career Success Online. You can comment on
one or more of the scenarios. Remember
to think about personality type and how it influences communication as you
write your comments.
Scenario 1 (E and I):
Mary and Carol are roommates and are discussing
paying bills for the apartment that they share. Mary is upset because Carol
paid the phone bill late. The more that Mary talks, the quieter Carol becomes.
This causes Mary to become even more upset. Mary starts talking in a loud voice
and Carol leaves the room. How can they improve communication?
Scenario 2 (S and N):
A sensing type and an intuitive type are on a
first date. What is each likely to talk about?
Scenario 3 (T and F):
Rachel and Jim have been married about a year. Rachel complains to Jim that he never says, "I love you" anymore. Jim replies that he would not have married Rachel if he didn't love her. How can they improve communication?
Scenario 4 (J and P):
Students in a business class are assigned as a
group project to design a business plan. This is an evening class and has
mostly adults who have busy schedules with work, family and school. Mike is a
highly motivated student who wants to get the group organized and complete the
project quickly. Mike is getting irritated at John because he cannot decide on
a topic and get going. John keeps coming up with different creative ideas for
the business plan. John is getting irritated at Mike because he thinks that
Mike is trying to control the group. How can this group work together to complete
a successful project?
My personality type is ENFJ. True to my type, I find starting conversations relatively easy and I’m almost never at a loss for what to say. In conflict, I can talk too much and listen too little, often repeating myself with the desire of being sure I’m being heard. I am a quick and logical thinker who draws conclusions very fast, and then has difficulty changing opinion or belief in the face of a counter argument. This “black and white” decisiveness makes me a good leader, but not great at navigating interpersonal conflict. I’m emotional and attuned to my feelings, and as much as I want my “facts” known, I want my feelings acknowledged which can make my communication style dramatic and intense when the stakes are high. In work and school, my communication style is very effective. I communicate clearly and can easily identify core problems and address them. When my emotions are strong, this ability is clouded by my feelings. Using ideas from the chapter, I can be a better communicator by slowing down in conversation and leaving room for the other person to respond. I can also be more open-minded to other people’s ideas and not rush their thinking process.
ReplyDeleteHi! We have almost the same personality type, so I totally understand what you mean in most of your post. I find that I have the same problem of needing to slow down during conversations. My brain is going a mile a minute and I feel like I always have so much to say. I also have a problem of talking too fast because I fear people will be bored of hearing me talk, but I still need to get the idea out. I hope that you found this chapter to be useful and will find ways to ease your communication with others!
DeleteMy personality type is ENFP. I actually learned quite a bit in this chapter in how and why I communicate with others the way that I do. This chapter has encouraged me to seek other information as well about my communication styles so that I can find things that work that help me communicate better.
ReplyDeleteMy biggest issue with communication is being an extrovert I find it very easy to start conversations wherever I am. But due t social anxiety and other anxiety disorders, I rarely go places where I can start a conversation. Then once in the conversation I can't stop talking, I have a hard time giving the other person a chance to speak. This is something I want to work on, by biting my tongue when I feel the need to keep talking or interrupting someone, and really focus on listening and hearing what they have to say.
I am a perceiving type as well which helps with dealing and enjoying the spontaneity of social situations, but once again is difficult due to social anxiety. I am really hoping to look more into effective communication skills because as we learned in previous chapters, being prepared is the key component of keeping your anxiety at bay. I figure if I learn more about it, I will gain more confidence.
I am an ENFP too!
DeleteMust be a "Starr" thing ;)
Glad the information is helpful. With your positive attitude and practice, communication will improve.
DeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteMary and Carol should make a clear schedule of who is paying what and when, that way there are no mix ups or late payments. During their discussion Mary should explain to Carol the consequences of her late payment and use “I feel” instead of blame words like “you”. Mary should also let Carol explain why she paid the bills late, maybe she had an event occur that was out of her control and Mary should understand that. Instead of yelling or being angry with Carol she should just understand that people are human and forget to do things, and ask Carol to promise not to forget to do it again
ReplyDeleteI agree with you, I think Mary and Carol should make a schedule and also i think its best if they sit down and talk to each other instead of yelling at each other.
DeletePart of the conflict here is between being an introvert and extrovert. The extrovert needs to let the introvert speak and it will be easier to come up with a solution. The introvert also needs to speak up.
DeleteI think that this video teaches a great lesson that you should always say positive things to people because those may be the last words they could hear. I think this is important because sometimes people are just speaking without thinking about how their words affect others. I think it is better to be nice to people from the start than be rude and then have to apologize later. To think that sometimes there couldn’t be a “later” like the woman and her little brother is a reality check and helps give a perspective on how people should act and realize how fortunate we are.
ReplyDeleteGood summary of the important point of this video.
DeleteMy personality type is ESFJ. People who have this kind of personality are really good people. Meaning of good people is that they have a heart of gold who care about other people and always there for them. They are really open mind and I believe they are the one who always make the plans or be on top of something. For example, I really care about people and sometimes I care about them more than I care about myself. Also, this personality represents people that are really communion a lot. For instance, I like to communicate a lot because how would you notice people around you or how would you make friends. Something else is that when you have this kind of personality you would feel that you are the planner or the leader who plans everything.
ReplyDeleteESFJ's are good at communication. This is one of your strengths.
DeleteScenario 3 (T and F):
ReplyDeleteRachel and Jim have been married about a year. Rachel complains to Jim that he never says, "I love you" anymore. Jim replies that he would not have married Rachel if he didn't love her. How can they improve communication?
Marriage goes through different stages throughout life. In this scenario, it shows how these two couples go through fail love story. Jim is the thinking type who doesn’t have emotions, and Rachel is the Feeling type who needs some love. This is true because men are always tough they love but they don’t show. When a woman loves she loves deeply and in that case she wants someone to show her the love which should be her spouse. Sometimes I LOVE YOU word means a lot and it keeps the mirage safe. In my opinion, if Jim doesn’t like to say word “I love you” he should show Rachel something else to prove her that he loves her. The best thing would be to surprise her for a trip to Paris because Paris is the city of LOVE and I bet every girl would admire to go there.
Good ideas for communication between men and women. A simple "I love you" is a lot less expensive than a trip to Paris! Although that could work also.
DeleteI can improve my communication and listening skills by first, talking less I tend to speak more than listen and sometimes I listen more when the subject is important and needs to be understand carefully second , ask questions , I love asking questions I can not deal with anything with out asking one question at least about it this way is really helpful to understand what is going on around you and because I have children I know how communication with children at the beginning that was difficult because I did not have experience to how communicate with children I think you have to listen to child before you talk and think before you say something
ReplyDeleteGood ideas for improving communication, especially with children.
Delete
ReplyDeleteYou can describe how you plan to apply some of the ideas in this chapter to improving communication with your children, boss, friends or parents or anyone who is important in your life.
I learned a lot of interesting and important things as this chapter that I had actually never even thought of. I learned a bunch of new communication and listening strategies. I never fully understood how important things like this are. It seems like if you are unable to communicate efficiently and be a great listener, you might not be that successful in life. I learned some different ways of communicating. I learned that giving feedback during communication, like asking questions and repeating information to make sure everything is clear. I also learned that listening is just as important as talking. Making sure you understand what others are actually saying before responding is essential to proper communication with each other. You should be able to communicate properly with everyone around you, may it be your friends, family, boss or just random strangers. Everybody should be able to appreciate a great communicationalist and this could even lead to a great career. Many careers such as lawyers, politicians, and businessman have to be great at communication with each other in order to be successful and make a lot of money from their clients. Overall, it is just good to be able to communicate with others and have them be able to communicate with you back.
HI Theo,
DeleteI like that you mention careers and communication. Great careers can come through communication skills.
This is a great summary of the important points in this chapter. Good job!
DeleteMy personality type is ISFJ .People who have this type of personality are really good people they care about other people and always they are for them at the same time they like to listen to the people more than they talk and I think that is a good skill so they can understand every thing and also they prefer to spend their time alone for instance I like to communicate a lot because how will I notice people around my and make friend also this type of personality talk and help people but they have few close friend and they are good planner or leader
ReplyDeleteISFJ's make good listeners. This is one of your strengths.
DeleteIt is important to practice good communication skills with your children, friends, family, bosses and coworkers. Having good communication with others can help prevent misunderstandings and tiffs. It can also help understand another's point of view better. To help improve my communication skills, I plan on being a good listener. Being a good listener and practicing active listening skills can help me understand others' viewpoints more clearly, or their particular needs in order to meet them efficiently. Making sure I understand the other person's point of view helps to further a sense of empathy in relationships. I think that considering what others have to say is an important key to communication. When I am present in a disagreement, I often times fail to see the viewpoint of the other person. This is usually a result of poor listening. Listening is key to improving communication skills and keeping an open-minded attitude. It is so important to have good communication skills when dealing with children. Listening, patience, using language they understand, and being clear is all essential when communicating with children. I always try to listen to my seven year old in order to show him that his opinions are valid and important. I also use very clear language with him, because a confusing message will disrupt the communication process. It’s a bad habit to talk over someone and not consider the other persons opinion. Making assumptions as to another's message is a sure way to end up with misunderstandings. It is important to be an active listener and consider the other person and the message they are trying to convey. This chapter will help me improve my communication at work and with my family. It will help me to make time to listen and be listened to improving all relationships in my life.
ReplyDeleteThis is a great summary of the important points in this chapter. Glad you find the ideas useful. Good job!
DeleteYou can describe how you plan to apply some of the ideas in this chapter to improving communication with your children, boss, friends or parents or anyone who is important in your life
ReplyDeleteThis is probably the most important thing that I read in this chapter because I'm not the type to communicate that well, or express what I'm feeling unless I am comfortable with where I am at. The way I can improve my communication skills is listen and then speak. Listening is probably the biggest thing when it comes to communication. Body language is also a big thing when it comes to getting better communication skills because when it comes to everything, your body language can come off as everything to the person who is listening to you. On top of that actually listen to what they are saying to you when they talk back to what you are saying, when you respect each other everything will go better when you talk and communicate to one another. Another good skills is asking questions and repeating what the person said so they know you are engaged in the conversation. Be really empathetic towards what they are saying to you and don't take everything too personal, everything will be okay in the end, and when you talk it out then you will feel better and so will the other person that you are talking to. The person who I would talk most or want to communicate with would have to be my old boss, she was the worst person to talk to because of how she is and her personality. But she is my boss and I had to communicate with her and in the end once I did everything was okay. So if you are having problems I would talk and air everything out. Communication is everything when it comes to life, especially at work, school, and loved ones.
Glad you found the information in this chapter helpful. Good summary of the important points in this chapter.
DeleteThe video Lessons from Aushwitz, The Power of Our Words shows how significant words can be. The story is about a sister that said some hurtful things towards her younger brother, which to us might seem normal, but in the case where she would never see him ever again proved to be a difficult problem to deal with. The words "I will never say anything that couldn't stand as the last thing I ever say" were her words once she got out of Auschwitz. Although we can't possibly be that way, we can certainly adapt towards living into it. Her statement really shows meaning of how we can improve our communication skills because words can sometimes cause a great deal of damage to those we inflict, and can a meaning on a much larger scale which results in some things that we never wanted to end up happen. This reminds me of the time when I called my friends or family bad names, I was quite young at the time, so to think it was harmless was the mindset I was in. But I learned how those words had an effect on them, and I began doing it in a different way, a more calm and efficient way and I saw the difference. When ever I would be mad or angry about something and call my brothers out on it, the outcome would usually be a conversation battle that would be endless until our parents had to break it up. But I see now the large effect that just even a slight change of communication can have on a person. We don't mean the words we say sometimes and we sometimes say it in a terrible way, but we can learn from our previous experiences.
ReplyDeleteI liked your summary of the video and think you have a good understanding of effective communication. Good job!
DeleteYou can describe how you plan to apply some of the ideas in this chapter to improving communication with your children, boss, friends or parents or anyone who is important in your life.
ReplyDeleteIn this chapter I learned a lot of things that can help with my communication skills. I can apply asking questions for my skills. I can ask a person to repeat themselves or clarify what they are saying because I tend to second guess myself. I second guess myself when communicating with others because I overthink the situation and this causes frustration. Besides having others clarify what they are saying I can pay attention tho their feelings because that can give me key signals to how they are feeling about the conversation. Understanding the thought process of another individual is hard and we can understand through clear communication; however, we tend to jump to conclusions because we feel as if we are right. We should find a resolution to any situation that occurs due to the fact when communicating with others we always want to be right. In situations such as communicating with your boss it is always good to listen because they come from a different standpoint and they could give you feedback on how to better ourselves. Communication is a major role in society because many things nowadays require us to work together and if we are not able to we surely are bound to get into an argument.
Glad you found the information in this chapter helpful. Good job!
DeleteYou can describe how you plan to apply some of the ideas in this chapter to improving communication with your children, boss, friends or parents or anyone who is important in your life.
ReplyDeleteThis was a very good chapter with a lot of really good information, like any other chapter, I learned something new. I never had a hard time communicating with other people even if they have different personality types. Although what was really helpful for me in this chapter was the ways of dealing with a discussion, even if it was with family, friends, and pretty much anybody. In any situation anybody can make the mistake of pointing fingers saying "you did this" "that was you", which can cause a bigger discussion because people don't like getting fingers pointed at them for something they didn't do or even if they did its not the right way to go in a situation. And thats a good tip for people who have children because i know when i was little and me and my sister had discussions i did not like when my mom came in the room and just assumed it was me or it was her, because it honestly just makes it a bigger deal. Also when your upset or mad don't go on and yell and someone because they aren't doing something right, the them how you feel nice and calm because if you go into a situation with a bad attitude its not going to fix the problem or end it its just going to make it a bigger mess.
Great insights on effective communication.
DeleteYou can describe how you plan to apply some of the ideas in this chapter to improving communication with your children, boss, friends or parents or anyone who is important in your life.
ReplyDeleteFor me this chapter has been useful in understanding the way I communicate with people. I've realized that sometimes I seem not interested in what people are saying because of my introverted attitude even though I am listening and do actually care. So what I've learned is that by repeating what the person is saying will allow me to appear as if I am actually listening and understanding what the person is trying to communicate with me. Showing the other person that i am listening is the best way for me to improve my communication skills.
I am a introvert as well and I can relate! My problem is a bit different than yours though. With me I think my problem is the fact that I concentrate to hard on my response. Doing so makes me lose focus and I also get anxious and end up keeping the majority of my thoughts to myself leaving people with the feeling that I am not into the discussion because of my short answers but I am. I think the repeat method would be beneficial to me as well. By repeating what is being said I can stay focused on the topic and seem like I am engaged while also having time to think about what I want to say. I think it would take a lot of awkward pressure off of me as well because I wouldn’t just be standing there not saying a word like 98 percent of the time, I would be talking too.
DeleteBoth of you have a good description of the introvert dilemna. I have had to face these issues myself and learn to speak up and communicate. Good job!
DeleteOur words are powerful whether or not we believe them to be. After watching Lessons from Aushwitz, The Power of Our Words, I realized how important it is for us to think about how our words affect someone. Multiple times I have said statements out of anger or frustration to people I care for and I don't think about how it will affect them. When we are angry, we don't usually think about what we say because adrenaline and emotions take over. If I was in a fight with a friend or family member and I was unable to see them ever again, I would be like the older sister in the video. I wouldn't forgive myself for being upset at a friend or family member especially if it's a small tiff. Rarely do we think before we speak during certain situations and I think in situations where there is a lot of anger, it would be best to end a conversation with a statement that would neutralize the situation for the time being. One little comment can resonate in a person’s head for a long time and that could be the last thing you say to him or her. Is it worth to criticize someone or make harsh comments that could potentially be the last impression you give?
ReplyDeleteI like your comments on the video. They are especially important for good communication with family.
DeleteScenario 2.
ReplyDeleteThe sensor personality of the duo will make conversation by talking about interesting places they have visited or personal experiences they want to share with their partner. For example, of this would be talking about a vacation in the redwood forests of Northern California. Also, the intuitive personality would discuss ideas and abstract topics such as dreams or social norms that do not seem normal. For instance, in reply to the topic of redwood forests, the intuitive person would reply with how strange it is that society has distanced itself from something as beautiful as nature itself, the place where we lived before global industrialization. Tangents like this might take the sensor by surprise and they might not know how to react.
For Scenario 3, Rachel and Jim need to realize they have different personality types, causing them to express affection in different ways. For Rachel, Jim can reassure her that he still loves her by doing little things like surprising her with a romantic lunch when she came home or sending flowers to her work. He can take little steps to show he loves Rachel without actually saying “I love you.” or " I miss you" Rachel needs to realize that Jim is a thinker, he married her because logically, if you truly love someone, you marry them. If Rachel believed that Jim would change his behavior when they got married, she probably should not have married him. She cannot change how Jim is as a person. Rachel is feeling insecure and Jim needs to be there for her. After Jim takes action to reassure Rachel of his love for her, they should gain a better understanding of their relationship dynamic.
Your comments show great understanding of personality types and how they influence communication. Good job!
DeleteIn scenario one I think Mary is the extravert and Carol is the introvert. I definitely understand why Mary is upset but she has no right to yell at Carol. This is not effective communication. I feel that Carol became quiet and eventually left the room because Mary not only was yelling but she never stopped talking. I've seen some people shut down when other yell at them. Not because they are scared but its probably uncommon for someone to talk to them tike that. I've had roommates in the past and one problem we never had was paying the bills on time. I also wouldn't listen if someone was yelling at me. Mary should have explained why she was upset and been prepared to listen to Carols response.
ReplyDeleteYou did a great job of analyzing this situation through the introvert and extrovert perspective.
DeleteI can apply some of these ideas to all my relations with others. For one its always a good thing to talk less and listen more. This chapter was interesting to me because I can really apply it to my life. I was just telling my partner that he doesn't listen to me. Maybe we don't listen to one another. Another simple way is to not talk when the other person is talking. Lastly there's no need to place blame if the other person has taken responsibility and acknowledged their mistake. I know I can easily become unapproachable and defensive if I don't want to hear something someone is telling me.
ReplyDeleteGlad you can apply the ideas in this chapter to improving communication in your personal life. Good job!
DeleteWhat is your personality type and how does it affect your personal communication style?
ReplyDeleteOne of my personality types is Introvert meaning that I am a great listener, needs time to think and likes peace and quiet. They think before they talk and they are often reserved and reflective. Most of this information is from the chapter, but I wanted to talk about this specific personality of mine because I feel that it relates to me the most. I relate to this because, I like having notice ahead of time and having things planned out because I hate when things happen and I am not prepared. It this chapter is says that introverts try to act like extroverts in social situations. I feel as if I do this sometimes to try to improve and not be such a shy person. It also says that since this takes effort that us introverts need to time relax and recharge after these social events. I am the type of person who is like that and I do not like partying all the time I need time to myself. I like staying away from people and distractions because that if where I feel most comfortable.
This is a good description of the introvert type.
DeleteMy personality type is ESTJ. ESTJ personalties are outgoing, strong willed, and responsible who like to be in a social environment. One main thing that is said about my personality type is that we like to play by the rules, like fairness, and have very clear expectations. It is actually pretty accurate because I have a standard way of doing things and always expect my standards to be followed not by others necessarily, but myself. I am also very driven and have a strong work ethic. My communication skills does reflect my personality because I am a naturally social person who doesn't shy away from sparking up conversations or interacting with people. Personally, when I say something I say it very clearly and bluntly that you really should not misinterpret what I said. When I communicate, I am very straight-forward and to the point. Also, I feel like my personality is very welcoming and genuine that I do not really face difficulties in communicating. One thing, I would say is that I can come off arrogant sometimes and think I am always right but I will always try to see both perspectives before stating my opinion about any situation.
ReplyDeleteGood description of the ESTJ type. Just keep in mind that feeling types may misinterpret what you are saying and why you are saying it.
DeleteScenario 1 (E and I):
ReplyDeleteI could easily tell that Mary is the extrovert and Carol is the introvert. From what I have learned in this chapter, "I" statements would defuse this type of conflict while also solving the issue in a way that won't frustrate either person. The extrovert would have a chance to express her feelings in away that wont make her introvert room mate shut down. Of course Carol would try to avoid the conversation if she feels attacked and like it could lead to an argument. This would end more smoothly if Mary took a different approach when starting the conversation. Mary could express how she feels without making Carol feel attacked by saying something like "I feel upset when the bills are paid late." In return Carol would more than likely feel comfortable enough to engage in the conversation therefore Mary won't feel upset or that her feelings are dismissed. From there together they could discuss why it happened and ways to make sure it does not happen again. The way the conversation is approached has a lot to do with the outcome of how that conversation would go!
Good application of the communication strategies in this chapter.
DeleteRachel and Jim are having problems in their relationship. Rachel keeps saying that Jim doesn't say I love you to her anymore. This is making Rachel feel unloved and worried. Jim can resolve this problem by telling her I love you every morning they wake up. Jim is probably busy but he knows he loves her. Rachel needs to understand that he committed to her by marrying her and she is the love of his life. Communication is the big key if Rachel wants him to say it day and night Jim can do it before sleeping and when he wakes up.
ReplyDeleteMary and Carol are having problems with each other. Mary is upset because Carol payed the phone bill late. Since they live together it might not be fair to the other. When Mary was getting loud with Carol she should've calmed down and talked to Carol calmly. Carol was already feeling bad and sad. Yelling at her made her breakdown and have fear. That is why she ran away and went to another room away from Mary. Instead Mary should've not been a savage and yell she should of tried to help solve the problem.
ReplyDeleteGood analysis of communication problems and personality type.
DeleteWhat is your personality type and how does it affect your personal communication style?
ReplyDeleteMy personality type is INFP and my personal communication style is more on the side of extrovert because I like to talk without being held back of What I should say or not. I tend to be open and enjoy my conversation with the other person, but if I have a relationship with this person. Other than that, I am more feeler type which means I like to express my emotions, but I don't like to express too many of emotions. I keep thinking and feeling balance when I am talking to someone because it is logical and expressive. I mostly like to be in between of these all personal types because I think it balances your communication style. But, It is hard for me to start a conversation with people. I tend to be more like waiting for people to come up and talk to me. I get so nervous when I start talking to anyone that I like as a friend because I over think. I have fear of asking people what I want or need of help from them. It has been an issue of mine, but after reading this chapter, I got to have ideas on how to fix it. I will try to talk to people first and I will ask people if I need of help.(222 words)
Good ideas for improving communication.
DeleteMary and carol should sit down and talk about this problem. None of them should be raising their voice at each other or leaving the room. They should sit down and make a chart of who is paying the bills and when to pay them. Yelling at each other and leaving the room is not going to get them or anyone in this case anywhere. It will most likely happen again if Mary and Carol do not discuss their problem together with a normal conversation without any yelling. The best bet for them is to come up with a schedule of who has to pay each bill and keep track of the due dates as well.
ReplyDeleteIf Mary and Carol can realize that they have different communication styles based on being an introvert or extravert, this can help them to solve the problem.
DeleteMy personality type is ENFP. I consider myself an introvert over an extrovert. I say this because of my past experiences. I am not comfortable in front of large audiences. My introvertness does have a profound effect on my current communication style. I notice from being in position of leadership and in school clubs that I have a difficult time expression myself. For example, when I'm in a meeting, I feel like giving my opinion, but something deep inside me compels me to shut up like a clam. I know that I have good ideas. I am pretty sure that no one around while think my ideas are dumb. I just find it difficult to expressing my thought. Another example is during my last job. I was assign a leadership position. I was not a bit comfortable leading. Looking back I know that I was a horrible leader. I will also add that confident is a major role in this too. I don't feel that I'm confident enough. Once I become confident enough in myself then I will be able to be in front of large audiences. The only way to surpass this problem will be to get myself in uncomfortable positions. I think its possible, but will it will be a difficult task that I will overcome.
ReplyDeleteIntroverts have some challenges with communication. Good preparation and the willingness to speak up can help. Sounds like you are on the right track.
DeleteScenario 3.
ReplyDeleteIf a wife was complaining that her husband never says he loves her, he needs to find a way to show that he loves her. otherwise, she may stop believing in him and get sick of his attitude. They should talk about it and maybe give reasons to each other as to why they love each other. Jim might be busy with work and other things and just does not really think about saying that he loves his wife since he assumes that they both already know that. They should go out maybe once a week and just enjoy themselves and really get to know each other in a way that shows that they care for each other.
Good analysis of the thinking and feeling types and how they communicate.
DeleteMy comment is on the video that was linked in this blog. What I learned from that video is how crucial words can be. How the placement of a word and the description of its contxt can either cause happiness and content yet can be a poisonous toxin. Words hurt and we use them to show emotions. But our point can be carried out using a different response such as using "I" to clarify how we truly feel. We are all different and each of us triggers different responses to different phrases. Watching the way how we speak to others is an important characteristic. Speaking to friends and family in a manner that is not harsh nor it will attack their beliefs or ideas that they share. Being open minded will lead to that development and character. Let us not judge quickly and comment before we think everything through. I always try to put myself into others' shoes and see the world from the perspective. The experiences they've been through and the achievements they accomplished to shape them where they are today. That's where the videos main point comes in. Let us be open and not selfish when it comes to argument. Have an open mind and an open heart. Speaking to a person you care about in a fashion that you want to be spoken to.
ReplyDeleteI think your words about this video are powerful. I like your statement about having an open mind and an open heart. Good job!
DeleteI had learned a lot of things in this chapter that I know I can apply to almost everyday things at all times. For example, I found it really interesting for the I statements how you should express your feelings and communicate rather than blame each other and find almost no result in the end of the argument. By telling your partner your feelings and experience or anybody in that case you have a much likelier chance of having the other person understand the issue rather than just argue back and fourth, which will never get resolved. Another thing I found interesting in the chapter is how well the feelers and thinking matched myself and my personal characteristics, it was great to see how I can relate it to all my personal past experiences. Overall, it was very interesting to see other different types of personalities that matched what mine and other characteristics lacked or benefited. It was a fun and interesting chapter and im glad I read about it and found all the differences in myself and others.
ReplyDeleteGlad you found the information in this chapter helpful. Good job.
DeleteScenario 2 (S and N):
ReplyDeleteA sensing type and an intuitive type are on a first date. What is each likely to talk about?
A sensing type is a person very effected by the physical senses; physical senses and experiences leave lasting impressions on them. The sensing type on a first date will most likely talk about real, physical experiences they've had in the past, such as Places they've gone on recent vacations, experiences in sporting events they've recently participated in,. An Intuitive type is more effected by abstract and mental things. On a first date, an intuitive type might talk about philosophical issues, personal stances on ethical issues in the news, and creative ideas they have been thinking up recently.
plan to apply some of the ideas in this chapter to improving communication with your children, boss, friends or parents or anyone who is important in your life.
I plan on improving my listening skills in order to get along with my dad better. I am sensing type, and he is very much a percieving type, and for the most part we drive each other absolutely insane. I plan on trying to be more understanding on his need for structure and organization, and try to make sure when talking to him to do so with an attitude that clearly conveys the message i intend, and not one changed by a negative attitude because I am annoyed or angry.
Good ideas for applying the material in this chapter. Hope it works to improve communication with your Dad.
DeleteScenario 2 (S and N):
ReplyDeleteA sensing type and an intuitive type are on a first date. What is each likely to talk about?
The intuitive type will likely be most comfortable talking about feelings, ideas, and things that are abstract. He will be most comfortable in the creative/imaginative realm. The sensing type, on the other hand, will be much more comfortable in a conversation that’s focused on concrete, tangible things. Sensing types enjoy things they can touch and see. The centerpiece, the menu items, the weather, the parking situation. What they did that afternoon. For the N, the conversation will be far less dull if it veers away from the every day things and heads in a more hypothetical direction. The N would probably like to talk about how the S is feeling. What brings you the most joy, what is your biggest fear? If you had 1 million dollars, how would you spend it? The N enjoys hypothetical questions and imaginative conversation even if it has no practical value.
Scenario 3 (T and F):
Rachel and Jim have been married about a year. Rachel complains to Jim that he never says, "I love you" anymore. Jim replies that he would not have married Rachel if he didn't love her. How can they improve communication?
Rachel needs to understand that Jim does love her, but shows his love in other ways. Rachel can observe other ways Jim shows his love for her. Maybe Rachel can communicate to her husband. For example, “Honey, I know how much you love me, but it really makes me feel loved when you tell me you do.”
Jim needs to be more sensitive to Rachel’s needs. If his wife is complaining that he never tells her he loves her, maybe he could take the hint and realize that is important to her. Sometimes communication can really go a long way. In this case, the affirmation is obviously very important to his wife. He should try to challenge himself to be intentional about affirming his love for his wife. I think this is an example of a very selfish couple ;)
Your comments show a good understanding of personality type and communication. Good job!
DeleteBased on my personality from Do what you are is ENFJ. I am the type of person where I am warm, outgoing and talkative. I can make friends very easily. I care a lot about my family and friends. I am empathetic towards my peers, I feel for people and I like to help guide people to figure out their problems. I love listening to people and being there for them. I like to be very organized and productive with my time. I like to be in charge of things and be in charge of complicated or hard tasks. I am the type of person to create a conversation with anyone. I used to be extremely shy but now I have grown and found my voice. I am extremely friendly and love to communicate with people. I have learned that communication is key to any relationship. My one problem is, I am really bad with conflict I break down and I get really uncomfortable. I have been working on that, it is very interesting because based on my personality type is says we aren't good with conflict. I know what is expected of me and I care what people think. I do get very sensitive at times but I am working on that.
ReplyDeleteGreat insights on communication style and personality type.
DeleteMy personality type is an ENTP. This means i think more than feel, I am more intuitive than a sensor, and I am more of an extravert than an introvert. Being more intuitive than a sensor cause me to be more attracted to the non-physical features of something and less about the physical features. I find this to be accurate because I notice myself often using my senses to discover and create possibilities with what I am given. As a thinker, I like justice and clarity. Although I respect people's feelings and don't ever want to offend anyone, their feelings are often not what I make decisions on if it is for the bigger picture. I usually try to find a balance between each, though, because I do not like the idea of choosing my own decision over someone's feelings. Being an extravert helps me use all these habits in an outgoing way. I am very comfortable with letting people know what's inside my head and why I choose to do or think the way I do.
ReplyDeleteApplying ideas from this chapter can improve my communication and listening skills in many ways, and if I could share them with the people around me, I would. I would recommend not interrupting when someone is still talking. Even if you're just so exited about something you can't wait, it is still better to hold off until they're done talking. I also would recommend people to not be on their phones or doing something else that requires their attention while someone is talking to them. They might not fully understand what someone is telling them and respond with little effort. This makes them forget what the conversation was about later as well. It does not "sink in" as well as if they were conversing with their full attention.
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ReplyDeleteThis video is a great to watch. It makes you realize that anything you say someone could be your last words. Even if you may disliked someone at one point Or you were angry with them. You will never get to see them again. The way she vows to never say to someone something she wouldn't say if it was their last time seeing each other is such a wonderful idea, if only I could do something to that extent. Having an open mind about things helps you not have to act in a rash way. I had this one friend who's mom had cancer, but didn't find out till it was stage 4 and they would fight all the time. about small things and they never got a long. Her mother passed away days after they had the biggest fight and my friend realized she didn't even remember the last time she had told she had loved her. She just remembers yelling at her. That is what she will live with the rest of he life. She will regret it and will wish that she could have not said tings like that. You never know when your last moment on earth will be and so you have to make the most of it and that everyone with kindness and respect.
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